evening the former was chopping wood, and as he was very clumsy at it, I took the ax from him to chop, asking who the wood was for? and Bertha replied, to my delight, "For me." But later she asked with equal attention that I would like to stop. When I wanted to leave she had just gone to fetch water, but I was determined not to leave without recommending myself to her, so I asked Mathilde(130) where she was; I went to meet her and asked her whether it was still possible to cross the river. She said yes, here and there, but added that she didn't know for sure whether the board was still there. I'm still annoyed that I didn't ask her to show me the board, which would have given me an opportunity to tell her about [Mrs.] Rehn. I walked very slowly, hoping to see her coming to the water again; She actually came later, but I was already across the river and couldn't come back with any shame; But I thought about it and wanted to ask her about [Mrs.] Rehn on the supposedly lost footpath, and so I went towards her on the other side of the river, but she was already gone again. But in order not to be understood by those who might have seen me wandering around, I returned across the river and went home on the right side. On the way back I lost my handkerchief -- --

In the evening the protector ate radishes with me, which told Mr. Bauer where I had been ( 105 ), which I didn't want to tell him before, but instead avoided his question. However, if he suspects or knows the reason for my visits to Klemzig, I would prefer it.

God, who guides every soul that fears and loves you according to your wise and gracious counsel, lead me to the goal of my hopes.

August 17th, 1839.
As I was about to go to the restaurant, I met Maid Seeländer(131) on the street, who asked me if I hadn't seen Bertha Teusler. Surprised and filled with the hope of an answer to my letter, I hurried home, but my waiting and hopes were disappointed, I received nothing all day.

August 20th, 1839.
At 11 o'clock in the morning I received a letter from my Bertha from the postman. I was shocked at the beginning, but then came back to my senses as I diligently looked over the entire letter. Although I am dissatisfied with Bertha's answer because I cannot imagine the thoughts and feelings of her soul as I wish, I still find reason for strong hope, especially in the request not to give up prayer. This passage, as well as the devotion to God's will that prevails throughout the entire letter, shamed me and increased Bertha's value not a little, even if I could have been increased in another way. The other half, by denying pleasure in my pain, was touching to me.

( 106 ) August 21st, 1839.
Today I gave Mr. Hall my letter of thanks for the support mentioned on the 16th of this month. When I asked to be excused for any mistakes that had crept in, he